Friday, October 11, 2013

Let’s talk about Top Privilege

So let’s talk about Top Privilege. Do you guys believe that in the gay community tops are more desired than verse or bottom guys? Do you think this lets total tops get away with more than bottoms might? Another good question is, what exactly makes a total top? Does he have to be hung? Fit? Tall? Or is it simply his refusal to "take" that lets him get away with so much more?

As a total top myself I’ve notice some of the fringe benefits of being one. The first and most noticeable is that I really don’t care what I’ve eaten prior to having sex. Chipotle smothered in curry with a side of gravy or Taco Bell and a PBR to wash it down? Sounds great, now lets fuck! But if any of my former partners or my current boyfriend was to have just one of those items, you can pretty much guarantee it’d be a “bad night to bottom”. So either no anal or they risk having a potential embarrassment due to the nature of them getting penetrated.

The second thing I’ve noticed is the reaction on my Grindr when they see a fit 6’2 Total Top show up in their area. I’ve literally shown multiple friends that with those stats and a crap photo I can still get a hit every 5 minutes for the next 3-5 hours. However when I remove Total Top from the description it drops to 1-2 hits every hour. I’ve also noticed that the assumption is that I’m masculine (despite my somewhat twinkish appearance) is always gathered when I put that I’m a TT, but if I take it away I always get a question along the lines of “You’re masc right?”.

It seems to me that no matter what, total tops seem to get a trophy boy status in a world where it should be more about two guys having a good time together. I’ve noticed that my straight friends all find this very weird. While some seem to think in the lines of the “male” and “female” of the relationship, others who seem to have gotten past that are still hung up on the idea that a bottom isn’t getting pleasure. And while I know there are certain cases of tops just getting themselves off, I’ve noticed one redeeming quality from my other friends who are total tops. We’re eager to please our bottoms. Maybe it’s this simple fact or maybe it is the illusion of masculinity and power that makes a total top seem like such a prize possession. I guess I really want to know from everyone what their thoughts are.

Catch you later,
Mike Tango

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